Indiana Family Law: Does The Judge Care If You Are A Good Parent?

Indiana family law covers divorce, paternity, custody, and parenting time. When a family law judge is considering issues of who should get custody or how parenting time should be modified, that decision is covered by certain statutory factors. In other words, the legislature has specified what the court must consider in deciding custody and parenting time modification cases. The factors are listed in IC 31-17-2-21 and 31-17-2-8 for divorces and IC 31-14-13-6 and 31-14-13-2 for paternity cases.

Interestingly enough, "the better parent" is not a factor.

So how do you show the judge that you are the better parent?

Saying things like “I love my children” or “I would do anything for my children” really does not work. The court assumes you love your children. The court assumes you will do anything for them.

What does work is developing a strategy of presenting the evidence all of your qualities as a parent within the factors listed in IC 31-17-2-8 or IC 31-14-13-6 as appropriate. This is more than simply getting on the witness stand and reciting the things you do with the children. It is also more than simply having your relatives and friends come to court and testify as to what a good parent they see you to be.

It is a strategic plan developed between you and your attorney at the beginning of the case and then modified and adjusted so that your most effective case is presented to the judge.

The judge will presume that both of you are good parents. The judge will decide the custody or parenting time decisions based on the facts of the evidence presented in court.

Some facts are cold hard numbers. The number of times you each take the children to doctor’s appointments. The number of times you each went to parent-teacher conferences. The number of times you each got into a shouting match in front of the children at parenting time exchanges. These are numbers that the judge can weigh and balance in reaching a decision on custody.

The emotional bond that you have with your children and that they have with you is not a number that can be placed on a sheet and handed in as an exhibit. It is a quality that must be communicated to the judge. This does not mean how many times you cry when you are testifying about your love for the children. It does not mean how outraged you are when you talk about how little the other parent cares for the children. It is a quality that is conveyed not only through the testimony at the final hearing but throughout the case in all matters.

A strategic approach to the development of your case must include an understanding that you wish to show the court exactly how you feel about your children and how they feel about you.

This is not something that is taught in a law school class.  I have spent over 20 years representing mothers, fathers, and sometimes grandparents in custody and parenting time cases in Hamilton County and central Indiana. For a strategic consultation review of your case, please use my CONTACT page. I will contact you within 24 hours to schedule a review at your convenience.